'Twas the night before release date

'Twas the night before release date and all through the house
not a program was working not even a browse.
The programmers hung by their cubes in despair
with hopes that a miracle soon would be there.

The users were nestled all snug in their beds
while visions of productivity danced in their heads.
When out in the lobby there arose such a clatter
I sprang from my desk to see what was the matter.

And what to my wondering eyes did appear
but "Superprogrammer" with a six-pack of beer.
His resume glowed with experience so rare,
he turned out code with temerity and flair.

More rapid than eagles his programs they came.
He whistled and shouted and called them by name.
"On menu! on report! on GUI and delete!
On monitor! on batch job! on function complete!"

His eyes were glazed over, fingers nimble and lean
from weekends and nights spent in front of a screen.
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head
soon made it clear we had nothing to dread.

He spoke not a word but went straight to his work
turning specs into code - this man was no jerk!
And after laying his finger upon the enter key
the software came up and worked perfectly.

The menus they menued, the deletes they deleted
the reports they reported and the batch jobs completed.
He tested each whistle and tested each bell
with nary a core dump and all had gone well.

The software was finished, the tests were concluded -
even the last-minute requests were included.
Then the users exclaimed with a snarl and a taunt,
"It's just what we asked for, but not what we want!"